a trip to pagoh

it was fun, fun and fun! :)
alhamdulillah that i'm part of that event.

penat

CPC.
memenatkan.letih.
:(

exam week is also known as emotional-outburst-week!

salam.

i'm about to come to the end of my 2nd posting, senior OnG posting.
next week is my exam.
and after much kekeliruan and all, i've got my examiner name.
on one part, it is good for us to know the examiner's name beforehand, so we can prepare according to that examiner's style.
on the other part, it also creates anxiety and stressful environment, for those getting the examiners they dont prefer to get, and for those who get the examiners that are not malignant, or killer examiner, it creates such a calming sensation and a feeling like 'i've passed my exam." or, " i'll pass my exam. no worries. the examiner is nice so she/he wont failed me.' definetely 'i can go to the exam with a good mood..'

as for me, hmm...it creates anxiety. and now i'm so stressful.

so, next week will be my emotional week.
i'll be having my exam on thursday, when all my groupmates and housemates (i think those in paeds hv finished their exam by then, too) have finish their exam..can u see how stressful u are, when all others will be chitchatting infront while you'll be reading your notes alone on ur desk? and how thankful they are, and i bet, they will go outing by then.

GERAM.MARAH.BENGANG.SEDIH.TAKUT.

hmmmm...............

my oh my.
DEAR ALLAH, do bless me in everything i do. do help me when i'm in need.jagalah hambamu ini dalam jalan yg lurus dan nyata.
DEAR ALLAH,kuatkan hatiku.

chocolate cyst

chocolate cyst mmg mcm chocolate!

* a type of ovarian pathology
also known as endometrioma = endometriotic cyst
can be removed laparoscopically
present with dysmenorrhea, pelvic pain

senior OnG posting..

salam..

this monday i'm going to enter my 4th week of OnG posting..and the next week will be my final week in OnG before pro exam 3...huhu..scary :(

last week i was posted in gynae rotation in H.Kjg..it was superb :)
1. i stayed at home the whole week except on tuesday bcoz i have central lecture on wednesday...
2. the HOD was soooo nice, and he likes to teach, A LOT~
3. i was able to observe laparoscopic operation, and it was such a miracle :), and to be able to see the fibroid being removed laparoscopically (of course after they had morselated the HUGE fibroid)...it was just...WOW! technology had made our lives easier rite?

nevertheless, obs rotation was fun too!but tiring of course~
hmm, the only thing that upset me was that i have to do such a hard cpc, and it is gynae case..adoi~
but anyway, come to think of it, it is better for me to do the cpc this time around, rather than i'm doing it much more later. so after this i dont have to spent my time doing other cpc (i hope!)

OnG posting is a busy posting, but i think at least, i'm not as stressful in OnG like i was in paeds posting last month...alhamdulillah :)
i just hope the upcoming weeks and posting will be much less stressful..i just can't really focused on my study when i'm so tired+stressful.

hmm.. i have lots of topics to be revised, so this is the end now! chowchinchow~

YA ALLAH, KAU PERMUDAHKANLAH SEGALA URUSAN HAMBAMU INI :)

finally..

salam.

finally my 5-weeks posting of senior paediatric has come to the end.
(i hope that i wont forget about paeds till my pro exam 3!)


i had a very tough time in this posting, esp this year
and i've failed my clinical exam.
my short case marks was not able to cover up my long case exam...
it was sad and tough time for me.
i had cried at least three times.
right after the short case exam, that very evening after i've performed my solat asar, and when our coordinator asked me to stay after the class, today.

i think i had done my best. but it seems to me now that, my best, is not the very best. i could have done better..

i've got TB meningitis as my long case.
of all the cases in the ward, i was really2 unprepared for this one. i had even skipped reading TB meningitis when i was preparing for my long case. and it turns out to be a VERY bad decision
BAD DECISION DINI.
and to make it worse, they've just presented TB for paed's CPC one week before the exam. and i totally forgotten what they presented and that shows that i did not give 100% attention to their presentation. sorry guys. my bad.

my marks was cut down when i could not state the TB medications. damn you dini! i've totally forgotten about that.

yes, i do regret for skipping TB meningitis. i regret for not focusing to my collegues' presentation. and i am sad that i do not know the TB medication. but somehow, it gave me a wake up call..
to read about TB meningitis...
to read about TB
to listen to what other's are saying/presenting..
and to quote from one of my lecturers, " learning medicine is not what you WANT to learn. but what you HAVE to learn. that's mean...you HAVE TO LEARN EVERYTHING FOR THE SAKE OF YOUR PATIENTS"

ALLAH had made me realised that if i dont know the management of TB, or TB meningitis, i could have killed my patient. it's better for me to fail now, then to fail later, when i'm really a doctor. "A MEDICAL STUDENT IS SUPPOSED TO BE A GOOD DOCTOR, NOT A SERIAL KILLER" quoted from the same lecturer.

all in all, i had a very tough time in paediatric this year, and since this is my first posting, it has, to some degree, demotivated me. but................. i should not be doing that, and i should study harder for my next posting...

for the sake of my professional exam and my future patients.

ALLAH, show me the correct way.
guide me if i have even sway a little bit.

UJIAN ALLAH, TIDAK PERNAH YANG MEMBEBANKAN HAMBANYA. YANG DIBERINYA, HANYA YANG TERMAMPU BUAT HAMBANYA.
UJIAN ALLAH, KADANGKALA MENYAKITKAN, TAPI YANG SAKIT ITULAH YANG KITA AKAN INGAT.

friday 1st july 2011. 9 hours after the result was announced